ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGggggghhhh!!

So just when it seems I finally have time to blog again, I get sideswiped!!!  But the news is good!

First:  I was actually hired to teach yoga!!! Yaaaay!  So I will be working HERE and teaching weekly.  I will hopefully know by the end of the week the day and time of the class.  When I do I cordially invite anyone who can make it to be my guest.  Just email me first, as I can only have one guest per day.  The facilities are beautiful and they have an amazing pool as well if you care for yoga and a swim.

Second:  I booked an Under 5 line part on "All My Children."  Okay... to those that know me. I do these pretty often so its not a huge deal.  But it has made my schedule all wonky since I have to make time to shoot.  I will update you with an air date when I have one if anyone cares to watch the real life hotel waitress basically play one on TV.

Third:  The reading I performed in at TBG was last night.  So I basically haven't slept since Wednesday and probably wont have a chance to sleep again until next Wednesday... sigh

Okay if you were just interested in an update and you really don't feel like listening to a disgruntled waitress rant.... please feel free to stop reading NOW.

Just some things that annoy the shit out of a waitress..... 

Don't Touch the Signs!!! If you see a reserved sign on a table don't touch it.... Please.  I am constantly baffled by the ass clowns that come to my job and take the signs off the table.  

OK.   If you take the sign off the table. Surprise Surprise... it is STILL reserved.  But now I have to go through the process of pointing out the fact that you have stolen my sign... I need it back .... yes the table is still reserved.. and you are an asshole.  My personal favorite is when I see people move/hide my sign and then LIE to me that they haven't seen it... For REAL.. are you people five.  Please save me the embarrassment of having to catch you red handed and pull the sign out of your purse... I ACTUALLY did that once..  Also, how do you think that's not stealing. I wouldn't walk into your office, take a stapler off your desk and put it in my purse.

More important:

Don't Touch ME!  If you don't know me, personally, as a VERY close friend, Do Not touch me. It's just weired.  I am amazed and disgusted at the amount of men who feel free to put there hands all over me while I'm working. I can't tell you how many times some dude leans in and give me a "Where's the bathroom, babe" and puts his greasy meat head hands all around my waste and sometime even on or approaching my ass. I usually respond by removing their hand with disdain and give it back to them.  Not to use the office example twice... but can you imagine someone doing this to a women in a business suit... at a meeting???  I think not.

Also, the kissing on the cheek thing. PLEASE don't kiss me on either cheek to say thanks for every Goddamn gin and tonic I bring you. I'm not french... chances are you aren't either. it doesn't make you look more cultured it just makes you look stupid. 

In addition please feel free to can the baby, honey/ your so beautiful lines.  Seriously, I don't mean to be a bitch but I know I'm a cute girl.... and I certainly don't think that makes me better than anyone.  It's genetics people.  I'm not impressed when you pick up on the first thing you notice about me and try to ingratiate yourself.  There is only one man who's opinion on this subject counts... and he thinks I'm beautiful with a fever and my head in a toilet.. So THERE!

I know I have covered a variety of these topics already... but I figured a little review never hurts. I now relinquish my soap box and encourage anyone else who would like to comment to jump right on.

xoxo

Fast Alice